Santa's Last Stop

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse

I was fast asleep when there came a loud crash
So I went to the window and I threw open the sash

The sight that I saw really made my day
There were eight bloody reindeer heaped on a sleigh

I laughed so hard all the way to the door
More than once I fell to the floor

It was apparent right away all the deer were dead
So immediately I turned and went to the sled

Again I smiled for there was no cause for alarm
All the presents were safe, out of the way of harm

So I went back inside to warm up in the heat
Then I snatched up a knife to cut up some meat

I was just finished gutting three of the deer
When I heard a faint moan from somewhere near

I flipped over the sleigh and to my surprise
Santa wasn't dead, he was just paralyzed

So I rolled up my sleeve and I showed him my new watch
"I WANTED A ROLEX" I shouted, then I kicked him in the crotch

To this very day his last words ring in my head
He whispered "Please don't bury me, I'm not dead!"